What Now?

 19 September 2023

My dear mother has died. 5 September 2023, she drifted off and never came back to us. Although it is true she hadn't been truly here for six months, it still is a blow.

 Tonight is her viewing, with the memorial service on Wednesday. I have written her obituary, and have finally completed her eulogy. 

 20 October 2023

 My father asked me before she was even in the ground to come remove her things. Insensitive as always, that man. My sister is no better. If I wasn't related to these people, I would have nothing to do with them. 

 My mother was right. I am the only who cares, the only one who mourns. My sister just wanted the jewelry she coveted. And to be number one in my dad's life. 

 26 January 2024

  Update

 My sister weaseled out of putting my mother to rest. She attended the funeral itself, but tore out of the church parking lot immediately after. Then she sent a text begging off, asking for forgiveness. 

 She has never yet, to my knowledge, seen her mother's grave. 

 In my opinion, she is simply an ungrateful coward. Her mother fiercely protected and loved her. And this is how she thanks her. 

 How can two people share the same parents and yet be so completely different?

  23 February 2024

 I'm still struggling with the death of my mother. As well I should be. I believe the intensity and duration of one's grief directly correlates to the level of love you had for them. 

 I will admit my father does display some signs of mourning.  Not many. I also believe it is mostly because he has lost his number one fan, and he has to now perform all the chores she always did. He has to do his laundry,  he has to wash his sheets.  He has to find someone to iron his shirts the way he likes. And he has to pay them to do it.

 Not speaking to my sister so I don't know if she grieves. Rather doubtful. She was never a fan of my mother. Of course my father has forgotten that. Which is laughable to me in that it only proves my mother was correct. He always has overlooked my sister's behavior. 

 Steve misses my mother terribly. But he didn't know her when she was truly 100%. He remembers her being active, but that was over 20 years ago.  Not her prime. Still, he has a better handle on what I am experiencing than anyone else in our little family group. He has been a rock on which I can anchor.I thank God for him being here for me, for my mother, for all of us.